Signs You are Settling for Being Single

Have you convinced yourself that you will never find love again? Do you think you will be single forever? These five signs could signal you are settling for being single:

Rom-coms give you a bigger bellyache than junk food.

When you watch a romantic comedy, love story, or read a romance novel, does your tummy start to hurt just a little? Do you feel like you secretly want “that” but don’t tell anyone? You could be settling for the single life when in reality you really do want a relationship, just like in the movies.

I wanted to be someone’s favorite person, unconditionally

Before I started on the path to finding my soulmate, I would watch my favorite romantic comedies over and over again. I loved watching Forrest Gump! You might not think it’s a very romantic movie, but, oh, how I always wanted to be someone’s Jenny. I wanted to be someone’s favorite person, unconditionally, no matter what I did!

To me that was true love, that no matter what someone did, good or bad, the other person didn’t care. I wanted that. I watched it over and over again, with and without the junk food.

You find yourself heckling happy couples.

If you and your single girlfriends are out and you see a couple walking arm-in-arm, do you comment, “Whatever, they are pretending,” or, “They are being fake, that’s not real.” Do you ever say things like, “I never want to be married again,” or, “I love being single and having all this freedom” to your friends. But then when you see a family out together, you feel an ache way down inside?

When I was single, I went to a Christian church. And when I would see a family together (mom, dad, and their kids) all together at church, I would start crying right there. When I was newly divorced I would say, “I never want to get married again.” But I was lying to myself. It was easier to hide behind those comments. The truth is that I was convinced it couldn’t happen for me. I didn’t want to admit that I was jealous, and that more than anything I wanted my family to be complete, or that I wanted to go do things all together.

Have you convinced yourself you will never find love again? That may be a sign that you are settling for being single.

You’ve got a million excuses for why you can’t be in a relationship.

I didn’t think I deserved love.

This is the biggest tell-tale sign of all! I can say it because I had every excuse in the book. I am a single mom, I work from home, I own a company, I’m too busy, I’m too independent, and on, and on, and on. The reality is that I was scared. I was scared that I wouldn’t find love and scared that I would find it –

but with the wrong person. How many reasons do you have for not being in a relationship right now? Have you been telling yourself that you will never find love again?

I’ve met so many single parents on my journey to finding my soulmate, and their stories are much like mine. They have all the excuses – “I’ve tried dating but it didn’t work”, “I never meet anyone awesome”, “I have young kids, nobody will want me and my kids, we are a package deal”. I’ve met special needs parents who think nobody will love their kids because they are different than other kids. Or parents whose marriages actually ended because it couldn’t withstand the challenges of raising kids together at all! So they tell themselves they want to be single, that it’s easier that way, they wouldn’t want to co-parent, they don’t want to go out with anybody. But we know that’s not true. Finding true love is possible! There is someone for everyone, you just have to believe it.

Be honest with yourself.

Is having ‘friends with benefits’ what you really want in a relationship? Are you living the life you truly desire? Or are you making excuses for why you can’t have true love in your life? Are you settling with being single forever?

Describe what you want in a mate. Write it down.

You can be the star of that romantic movie, even with the steamy sex scenes! You can have that leading man or leading lady by your side, that person who adores you and cherishes you for exactly who you are. But you have to be honest with yourself, starting right now.

Everything I wrote in my soulmate list came true! Now I am Mrs. Karen Stanley. It worked for me, and it can work for you!

You can manifest your soulmate, just like I did. Read about my true love revelation to find out how it happened.

Make sure to subscribe below for my weekly(ish) newsletter below for more tips and strategies for cultivating self-love, self-confidence, healing from past trauma, and attracting Mr. Right. One of the strategies is listening to My Love Playlist exclusively, and I put the whole thing on Spotify if you want to follow along and add to it if you have a good love song! And if you want to follow me on Instagram or Facebook, I’d love to be friends!

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