Unwritten by Natasha Bedingfield – My Love Playlist

I love looking at the seasons of life as chapters. Probably why I love this song so much. It helps me remember that no matter what we are going through at any given time, it is only temporary. And no matter what we’ve gone through, the rest of our life is still unwritten. We can change the story. Start a new story. At any point or at any age. Everything is still unwritten.

When my kids were toddlers, I thought that was a “hard” chapter. I was a newly single mom, working full-time, traveling for business 2 days a week, if not more. I had a full-time nanny and was plagued with guilt every time I backed out of my driveway to go to work.

Now that they are almost 17 and 19, I think about the memories in that chapter and I wish I could jump back in it, like Mary Poppins jumping into the painting. I wish I could snap my fingers and be there now. Experience it all over again. Hear their cute teeny voices and all the words they got wrong. For the first year when Brandon was learning to speak, I couldn’t understand a word he said. It was so frustrating for us both, and after repeating something 5 times and me STILL not getting it, we’d both end up in tears.

Then, one day were driving in the car and he points and says “AR!” “AR!” I looked in the direction of his little hand, and I saw that he was pointing to a car. This kid was leaving off the first sound of every word! I finally unlocked the code to speaking Brandon! I could understand him! And he’d always get “m” mixed up with “n” so marbles were “narbles” and maybe was “naybe”. Remote was “Me-Rote”. Skipping was “thcooping” (he also had a lisp.)

Mom, the movie is THCOOPING.

I could go on and on. Everything he said was hysterical. I have a huge list in a journal of all his words. I vaguely remember the tantrums anymore. I don’t remember it being “hard.” But I’ll never forget the day he pointed to an “AR” that unlocked the language code. So even chapters that we thought were “hard” have so many precious gems we will cherish forever. Same is true with all difficult chapters.

To say that divorce is a hard chapter is the understatement of the year. Divorce was the most difficult chapter for me to close. Sometimes we get stuck on the “divorce chapter” for years, long after the chapter ended. We feel like we’re starting all over. But you are not starting over. You’re starting again. Smarter. Wiser. Probably why I’ve always been drawn to people older than I. They’ve experienced more things. It’s not an accident that they are wiser and have better advice. They’ve personally experienced more and have learned more. That’s the only way to become wise.

Sometimes we don’t have control over when a chapter ends. If your spouse was the one who asked for the divorce or if they were unfaithful, you didn’t choose for your marriage to end. And, at the same time, you *are* starting a new chapter whether you wanted to or not. And, it’s your book. It’s still your chapter to write. What stories do you want to write? Do you want to choose to live your best life and create the best you while you are attracting your perfect partner? What does that look like to you?

Or do you fall into the trap of re-reading the last pages of the last chapter? Instead of writing your new chapter, do you keep reading the end of the last chapter over and over again?

I did. And I can never get that time back. Focusing on all the things that I wish had been different.

It wasn’t until I stopped re-reading the last chapter and re-playing those old scenes that I started being intentional about the life I WANTED to create. I wanted to create more joy, I wanted to create more memories with my kids. I wanted to attract a partner by becoming the person I wanted to become. I wanted to be proud of my life and my relationships with my kids. I want to be a good example.

Just setting that intention and getting super clear about what I wanted in my next chapter helped steer my decisions on a daily basis. Not that I WAS always the best example, but it helped me to keep improving and keep learning, keep reading, keep working on myself. Which ever ends! Like John Maxwell says, “There is no finish line. If you cross it, you’re finished.”

So, if you’re not too fond of the chapter you’re in right now, maybe it’s time to turn the page. Look at the blank sheet of paper, and write down what you WANT the next chapter in your life to look like? What do you want to read to someone a year from now? Two years from now? What pictures do you want to show your loved ones? What memories do you want to create? What will you share with your new partner who loves you and cherishes you and adores you above all else? You get to write it all. Let’s make it a New York Times Best Seller!

I am unwritten
Can’t read my mind
I’m undefined
I’m just beginning
The pen’s in my hand
Ending unplanned

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition
Sometimes my tries are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes
But I can’t live that way

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten

I can’t wait to read your next chapter! Please find me on Instagram or Facebook or subscribe below so you can keep me updated on your journey and I can cheer you along!

Sending you lots of love,

XOXOXOXO

Karen

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