|I love happiness life hacks!!! I depend on them! My emotions get the best of me sometimes, and it’s so great to have tools that help me get out of the state I don’t want to be in. When I’m really frustrated or sad, I get stuck, I don’t move, I ruminate, I get anxiety. I focus on the past. Get more anxiety. Remember all the stupid stuff I have done. Get more anxiety. Do nothing. Staying in those feelings for too long brings me further and further down. It’s a downward spiral that moves a thousand miles an hour. I wanted to find things that I could do to get me out of that, especially when I came home from a bad date. I have been there, and I felt like I was going to be single forever and all men were the worst. I know what it’s like, and I needed tools. That’s the whole reason why I wrote my book Becoming Mrs. Stanley! I struggled so much that I realized that I needed to create systems for myself to get out of frustration mode, and I wanted to share them with anyone who had a hard time being a single mom while trying to date again after a divorce. I wrote these happiness life hacks on my phone, and I took these notes with me everywhere I went. So when I was feeling down, I asked myself, “OK. What can I do differently than what I am doing right now? I want to do something so I could feel better.” I still use these all the time.
The more happiness life hacks and the more exercises that I did, the better I felt, and I visualized getting one more step closer to meeting my husband. (Even though we already knew each other for years, we didn’t come together until I consistently worked on becoming the person I wanted to be.) When I focused on the past and everything bad that happened in the past, and all the things I wished had been different, I visualized that I was going one step backward. These life hacks helped me “keep moving forward!” Walt Disney’s famous line, and one of the reasons why Meet the Robinson’s is one of my favorite Disney movies.
Here are my favorite happiness life hacks:
1. Be grateful.
Why does everybody say that? It’s so cliche now, I know. Well, maybe there’s something to it. I love how Greg Baer (who wrote the amazing book Real Love, and you definitely want to read it) explains why gratitude is so important:
“Gratitude is not a trick of positive thinking. Gratitude is a choice we make to simply acknowledge the truth about what we have, which greatly amplifies our enjoyment of everything we receive.”
Doesn’t that make so much sense? It’s also so important because it’s impossible to feel another emotion (hate, anger, sadness, blame, shame) if you are grateful. All of us have something we can be grateful for. I would write my gratitude list every day. I think of at least 3 or 4 things, and most days I’d just keep writing because there were more than 3 things to be grateful for! It puts me in this wonderful state and it sets up the whole day.
2. Focus on your Wins!
Focusing on your successes is going to help you get to the next success and change your perspective.
You will always find that which you actively SEEK.
You know how when you buy a car and it’s a red Honda Pilot or whatever and all of a sudden every single car is a red Honda Pilot? Where were they before? They were already there you just weren’t looking for them. If you focus on things that went right yesterday, then you’ll start looking for the things that are going right today. Then you keep your focus on the things that are going your way and you can use Charlie Rocket’s life hack: You’re on a winning streak!
3. Work Toward a Goal (Intention)
I like the word intention, even though it’s the same thing as a goal. I like it because it’s an action word. What I intend to accomplish. Maybe it’s a one-day goal where I’m going to walk for 30 mins or a weekly goal where I’m going to take the kids on an outing or a monthly goal where I’d like to hike a certain number of miles, or maybe I have an annual financial goal or a trip I want to take. If you write them down and do one thing today that gets you closer and that creates happiness! Once you attain a goal, you make a new one! Progress toward a goal creates that feeling of accomplishment.
4. Move your Body!
Just move your body, any way you like! I don’t like group classes. I don’t have the coordination. I tried Zumba once and it was a nightmare. I couldn’t follow along, I’m just doing my own thing in the back, and I look ridiculous! If you ever want to laugh hysterically, let’s go to a Zumba class together. Hell, I’ll go do it again just for the laughs, I do NOT have the coordination. But some people love it! Do what you love! Even if it’s going for a walk. I love being outside. I love to practice yoga. I love to hike. You don’t have to go fast. Just do something you like to do! Everybody likes something. My daughter doesn’t like to do a lot of aerobic exercises, but she loves playing handball at the gym. Moving actually makes you feel better. It changes your brain and you can get that energy out and feel better.
5. Regulate Your Social Media Feeds
I’m so tired of the negativity. I’m not making light of anybody who is going through a tragedy. What I mean is the people who are negative and that’s all they post about, or that’s all they comment about or they talk about liberals or conservatives every day and how much they hate them, or how much they hate the president. I’m over it. PS, how about you just have an incredible life no matter who is the president. I really don’t get how it changes anything. You may have to pay a few more dollars in taxes this year? How does that feel if you focus on that? You will always feel like sh*t when you focus on something you don’t like but you can’t control. We can create an amazing life, no matter who is the president, by the way. We can change our happiness and our mood by deleting people that are super negative because they don’t help you. I made a conscious effort to only follow people who post really cool sh*t or inspiration.
“Everybody can be great because everyone can serve.”
-Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
6. Find some way to serve.
If there’s one way to be happy and get your focus off of your own problems, it’s to help somebody else. If all you do is 15 minutes of listening, that’s serving! It’ll make you feel valuable because you are valuable. Doing things that help you see that, changes you.
7. See Every Date As Your Teacher
I believe every person that has ever been in our lives was in our lives for a reason, and when I shifted my thinking and looked at every date a teacher, everything changed. We are meant to learn from the people in our life. That includes all the douchebags. It’s frustrating and hard, but if you look at it as if you’re a student of life and a student of dating, you can learn so much! Focus on the lesson. Sometimes the only thing you learned is how not to be. If someone was unkind, write on your soulmate list “My soulmate is kind.” And the more you focus on that and the more you read it and edit it the more you start to believe that your soulmate is kind! He’s out there and he’s manifesting you right now!
To get more happiness life hacks, tips, and strategies for manifesting your soulmate, check out my Instagram feed!
Wishing you lots of love!